As Aunty Dies

It was a week ago that my sister called to say that Aunty wasn't expected to make it through the night. She has been in the nursing home and it was expected but my heart still ached at the thought of never seeing her again.

We always just called her "Aunty". It wasn't until my younger brother was addressing his graduation announcements, that it first occurred to him that aunty might have a formal name. Until then, Aunty was adequate for him as it was for all of us.

There was never any doubt about whether or not she would spend eternity in Heaven with Jesus. She was a devout Christian. I remember once she mentioned her prayer list was so long it kept her up late, just getting everybody prayed for. She has been the one person in my life who made me feel unconditionally loved from childhood on.

Just to share one example, during an especially difficult time during my "single parent" life raising teenagers, she came with a gift. It was for no particular occasion. When I opened the package I found an exquisitely beautiful cutglass crystal bowl. It was octogon shaped with a sawtoothed edging. It was gorgeous!

She said to me, "I know you don't have much that is "pretty" in your life right now, and I wanted you to have something that was "pretty." Of course, I was moved to tears at this loving gesture.

That is the kind of love and compassion she showed to people. She could see a need and fill it. If she had given me money, I would have spent it and probably never remembered it. Anyway she couldn't have afforded all the money I needed at that time.

I cherished that bowl. Even when things changed and I did have many "pretty" things in my life, that bowl was always in a place or shelf of honor. To me it was a true treasure. Since then I have passed it on to my son, along with the bowls story, to make sure it remains a family treasure as Aunty has always been.

As I write this, she is still among the living, having some good days and some not very good days. I keep checking with Southwest Airlines fares on line trying to anticipate the funeral date and can I work it so I can take advantage of Southwest's good fares.

All I can do now is to honor her and her children, my cousins, with my presence at her funeral. Not very much for a woman who gave me the security of being loved all my life.

I wonder if there are little things we can do to show people we love them and care for them as a means of encouraging them. A simple gesture like giving a person something "pretty" who doesn't have anything "pretty" could pass Aunties loving gesture forward and make a difference in another person's life.